Keeps me awake

a lot od things keep me awake: physical pain, anxiety, depression and unresolved heartbreak. tonight it was anguish over something that happened to me in 1970. it was a confusing time, and someone I thought was a friend, sneaked into my room at night and raped me. I was so confused, it wrecked my life. It actually took me 30 years to even clearly understand it was not my fault. I was asleep and thought I was alone. when I woke up it was too late. I was only 15, so under the age of consent and he was 18. I had clearly told him no earlier in the evening. It is horrible that anyone does such things. I was confused and manipulated for some time afterwards and I ended up leaving my boyfriend because I couldn't tell hím what happened, and I felt I wasn't good wnough for him anymore. I felt that way for many years. Nobody had a right to do that to me